Thursday, March 8, 2012

Hello Interwebs! 03/08/2012

Hello, and welcome to the first post of
"The World According to Neé"
Allow me to introduce-well me.  I  am a mom/wife who also works full-time in retail, crafter (when I have time), baker (when I[or someone I know]has a need), reader (when I'm not doing anything else)-and blogger after that. Beware-I can(and will) be blunt when I feel the need.
As I write this, I am eating my dinner-after working a full shift, I came home to warm up leftovers from my birthday dinner at Olive Garden.  That's right, I recently had a birthday. Don't get all worked up-it wasn't a milestone birthday or anything-just the 34th one.
I've been out of sorts since the actual day however, so life has been a bit of a roller coaster ride.
Up front, let me tell you, while I am a mom, my kids don't live with me. Someday, I may go into the whys and the whatnots, but for now let me just say it's way too complicated to get into in the first post. (And since I'm so into sharing right now)I am married,but my husband isn't around much these days. So while I am a mom/wife, at home I am simply the one taking care of 'The boys' my two cats. ['the boys' are Rambo and Joey-more about them later]
I have suffered from depression in the past, and to be perfectly honest-probably am right now.
I don't take medication for it, and yes I've tried them all. The myriad of side effects made my quality of life worse than the depression ever did. So I deal with it.
I work 40+ hrs a week, pay my bills, and keep the house from burning down. I am functioning-so I just go with it. My way doesn't work all the time, but I have learned to ask for help when I need it...mostly.
I don't recommend my way to anyone-it just works(for the most part) for me. I do have two meds I use fairly regularly-one for panic attacks and the other for insomnia. Working with the public sometimes triggers an attack-but since crying in the corner of an office supply store is not approved behavior-I have the pills. And for the nights(like tonight) when I can simply not get my mind to stop churning-I have the sleeping pills. I am not suicidal-nor have I ever been-but I have had friends that were. I know the signs, and am honest enough with myself to recognize my state of mind.
wow-this got way more dark and personal than I intended- so I think I'll end here for tonight. If you're still reading-then "Thanks!"-and I promise that next time will not be quite so dreary. I may even post a couple of pics of 'the boys'(and our recently departed third cat, Gabe.)
Sorry again for all the doom and gloom and death...I am a relatively upbeat person...I swear!

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